We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Right After I Find Out, I Forget

by Aaron Schroeder

/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

1.
One Way Stop 03:28
Who could save my life? If only a second or two Suntanned and spaced out Why do we do this to ourselves, when we don’t really have to? Fortune falls, exist before And there will be life after (too) We tell ourselves we had to get out of the way I’m still trying When everything’s a one way stop Did I fuck up? You said you gotta go somewhere If everything’s a one way stop I wonder what the next person is telling us now I’m sorry I don’t know how to put that glass in place I asked you “How good would it feel not to feel that way no more?” Then we’re stuck here watching all cars go by Fortune falls, a life before And there will be life after (too) I tell myself I had to get out of the way I’m still fighting When everything’s a one way stop Did we get lost? Unknowing only takes so much If everything’s a one way stop I wonder what the next people are telling us, oh I’m not staying here now I’m too afraid to move Skeletons wave in the trees I’m not staying here now but I’m too afraid to leave When everything’s a one way stop Did I get lost? I thought I’m trying to forget you When everything’s a one way stop Did I fuck up? We’re not far from Hollywood now If everything’s a one way stop Covered in mud from stepping down into pathways That wild animals have made, or was that us? I wonder what they’ve been saying
2.
Then slipping out of dreams, it’s like I’m dodging leaves I’m twenty feet from the ceiling We’re alive we’re not dying with stains on everything How many lifetimes do we waste or fake? I thought I knew what I was doing Ashing cigarettes in motel pools The way you seem so sure lying on dirty sheets As with any good weather there will be Terror (and rain) on the other side We faked it, damp hallways and handprints In obscene sketches Tijuana left it Your pink sunglasses melted on the dashboard Once I know what you’re really feeling I’ll rearrange mine A slice of lemon in a heavy Navy glass All this hassle just to make things seem sasy Stumbling trailing blood That I hope is my own We faked it Damp hallways and handprints In obscene sketches: Tijuana to here Your pink sunglasses melted on the dashboard Once I know what you’re really feeling But everybody has to pay sometimes Every heart we break and don’t ask why Tell you come on babe get up, come on please get up There’s no reason to lie here
3.
That Often 02:39
I don’t think of you that often anymore Cause when I do I find I end up wanting something that’s all wrong I know it’s awful what we burned in our path Like cathedral wax I’m melting Between even though it’s expected it hurts me Romanticizing simple needs Not to be left worth leaving I’m sorry I’m still learning that it’s too much for me now I don’t think you that often anymore Cause when I do I get lost ’02 Halloween All the best boys in love with each other and with you You said “I knew we’d end up here” Between, even though it’s expected it hurts me Romanticizing simple needs Not to be left worth leaving I’m sorry I’m still learning that it’s too late for me now There’s so many traps to fall down Put your lips on mine and walk out In my car I played ‘Chinatown’ Parked beside the hills, there’s no light The best things are stolen then shared We grew too tall, the wind knocked us down I don’t miss being a genius I just miss falling in love
4.
Wait Here 03:09
I didn’t want you learn my secrets But you asked so much that I had to say something Then I watched you graduate in the wrong season And I knew you thought I’m the better person But I don’t know my way Oh oh oh I have lost the way Oh Oh oh And I forgot my place What manner of junk lies beneath? It came close, swore you heard footsteps You wore my jacket in front of them But I forgot the way Oh oh oh I forget the way Oh Oh oh And I forgot I would stop this if I could Now we’ll wait here til we understand I’m gonna wait here til we understand If neither of us stops! Now I forgot the way Oh oh oh I have lost my way Oh Oh oh And I forgot: I don’t want to win, I don’t want to lose But it’s all I have left
5.
Wont Shut Up 03:08
Twenty years of the same things I haven’t always held my share I back away like you do too Picking at endings My head hits the ceiling if I get up too quickly here Phantoms limbs in walls I said I’m not like you Now I swear you won’t shut up Dancing ‘round with airplane arms Back on the street something changed I fell through love too quickly All endless dirge: who will I be when you found out who I really am? Just say goodbye to people that had come to see us off We got drunk, fell in the creek We made jokes out of everything Played me the saddest songs I threw up on your roses Flew me out for the day Meaning exists (in) how we relate Staggering through park ponds, making faces at ourselves Now I swear you won’t shut up Dancing ‘round with airplane arms Back on the street something changed I fell through love too quickly All endless dirge: who will I be when you found out who I really am? Saying goodbye to people that had come to see us… I thought I would change I see you away Our lives are just the shit we did These are problems that will look ugly and pointless when we’re Racing through the sky and on and on and on and on Now I swear you won’t shut up Gone too far or far enough Now I don’t want it to ruin If only for a second Back on the street something had changed I fell in love too quickly Who will I be when you found out who I really am? Saying goodbye to former selves
6.
Emptierheart 03:21
Pacing in a glass Valerie slow down I know what you’re doing and I want a part of Putting our arms aside I loved you more than you could It’s impossible to nurture this I’m not trying to win I won’t make up exchanges Pretty names they can’t learn (know) And your heart Rattling cages in the dark Empty your heart I’m sorry left in increments, come apart Pacing in a glass Lions beneath you aligned in opposites It’s something you whispered Our trues selves horrified At the current state of our lives Darling without you, I’m an idiot I’m just you I’m an idiot I make up exchanges And your heart Rattling cages in the dark Empty your heart I’m sorry left you increments, come apart (I won’t care if you don’t) You’re so good at walking around my mind I’m cool to burn it all down And all my life is a capo: I thought I was better but there when I found Your heart Rattling cages in my dark Empty my heart If this the old us then what have we got?
7.
Now you don’t want to talk about it I know how you feel I am always afraid, rushing through everything We could run, run, run Meant to let you go Didn’t see it then, I didn’t wanna know (uh oh) You should tell me the punks you know And where they scattered to You should tell me I’m losing myAmerican youth Then we could run, run, run Spiders can’t slow down You’ve given me things without meaning how Then we could run, run, run I want to be wrong From my passenger mirror put your make up on And the fires were beautiful but the fires slow down! World of things gone rotten Has been left behind in a sad, former glow The rules were different then, nobody could imagine me here Long lost don’t forget man, confidence is all disgusting Now you don’t want to talk about it I know how that feels Giving up sliding into glass walls too concerned We don’t know, know, know Anything at all What a slow defeat into drab adults Who are not so sure how we came to be dark water swimming pool cracked led into the sea (Alice, it’s okay, heaven wanna take you so far away The vulture’s coming back or do they never, ever really leave?)
8.
Wreckage of past Is there always a way (through)? I’ll wait for you there through the half doors and gates Derivative names like fake money exchanged I brace myself You panned the strings You handed me whispered fighting For half an hour I know exactly what I will do Sometimes I hate how you’re following phase A contra in time you were digging up graves When noise from the party is too loud to think I brace myself For context cues Somehow they always cling to you It’s hard to believe I haven’t known you before now You said this time it was tough for you And that I should stop repeating this loop If what matters is over Little obliterations happen all the time You keep adding em up You keep adding em up and up I brace myself For context cues Somehow they always get to you It’s hard to believe I don’t know you now Or half an hour ago
9.
An Hour Ago 02:58
This conversation’s a mess I don’t see what you meant I know it’s hard to be When you come back together And I’m not affected Laughing at the edges of our enemies Well I hope to run in to Every (single) one I once knew There… There.. And you know it’s hard for me Some closed off part of my head Reminds me of fighting On the steps, in dismal lighting The true nature of things are dying I hope that it’s too late And you say it’s lovely And you say it won’t fall apart And I’ll stay until it’s acceptable to leave A partial confession isn’t enough to erase soft burdens I am not there, I have never been Until an hour ago Nothing like inheritance Then you say it’s lovely And you say it won’t fall apart And I’ll stay until it’s acceptable to leave Riding in strained silence It permeates for centuries I follow love into the darkest places I just found that a partial confession isn’t Enough to erase I am not there, I have never been Until an hour ago Now you know it’s hard for me
10.
The middle life I’m waiting in a tower Caught in the remains of the day The last decade, a misunderstanding You sighed I can’t walk away in darkness hiding Alluvial out come violins Love is a poor excuse for madness ending We tried All in time I knew these words You wrote those lines I see you at the top of staircase sometimes All in time You knew these lines I spoke those words We just wanted the medicine and not the cure See me at the wake 01, 21, 13 away Post parade mistakes I’m convincing myself to be okay With all I’ve done wrong And With all that’s gone wrong Love is a poor excuse for madness ending We tried
11.
2000 Times 03:24
Between the wheels and the end of road The second floor said we’re not going home And from my car you figured out I was asleep, I’d let you down I shuffled my feet on red carpet stains We’re waterfalls filled with unending rain We’re going round like angels and We’re dying and we’re holding … Don’t you see? I’m no longer just breaking I lie still until the ghosts slide over me There’s a headless video network that’s putting poison into everything and Pull us away from hinges I’m living in guest rooms with you I gave you petals to toss, you threw em out And waves were once so far beneath our feet We can’t afford to go but we can’t stay over We can’t afford to go but we can’t stay over Don’t you see? I’m no longer just breaking I lie still until the ghosts slide over me I’m sorry I didn’t hold to you tighter then I’ve wrong been two thousand times now and I don’t understand Alive in public, dying inside Forever harmless You see me as I am A while, ago Shambling kindness I’ve known you too well Nothing gets blessed when all Of everything is a curse We thought we’d be safe if we rearranged So hot between the panes Don’t you see? I’m no longer just breaking I lie still as your ghosts slide over me I’m sorry I didn’t hold to you tighter then I’ve wrong been two thousand times now and I don’t understand Alive in public, dying inside
12.
I forgive myself I’m the last to hold on When we weaponize the past You were right before long (Your youth is like a shotgun) Is it the ones who are gone or the ones who are left? Now I cant understand The rest from the regrets I went inside your head Cause you told me to calm down I couldn’t see the ghosts that defend who you are now Now I suppose heaven is a slipping slope You hold so tight When everybody else lets go Betray me now I’m due for something wrong Not holding walls in place Get them down There are just two places: Back again now and very far away Trick me now I’m due for something wrong Not holding walls in place Get them down There are just two places: Back again now and very far away Figuring this out Sheets tacked in the windows I can’t read your eyes since you love get closed, get close Is it the ones who are gone or the ones who are left? Now I cant understand the rest from the regrets Not holding walls in place Get them down There are just two places: Back again now and very far away Trick me now I’m due for something wrong Separating space The rest from the regrets I’m listening The rest from the regrets I’m still learning The rest from the regrets I’m still learning The rest from the regrets I’m still learning

credits

released April 20, 2023

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Aaron Schroeder San Francisco, California

Puking in the fountains of youth

SF CA

contact / help

Contact Aaron Schroeder

Streaming and
Download help

Report this album or account

If you like Aaron Schroeder, you may also like: